UCSF Students Open Up to Destigmatize Mental Illness

Suicide attempts. Sexual abuse. Arrests and forced hospitalizations. Those were just some of the painful experiences shared by current and former UCSF students during an Oct. 15 panel discussion on “Living with Mental Illness.” The event, part of Mental Health Awareness Week, brought together six individuals who have suffered from – and learned to cope with – depression, bipolar disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder. While their experiences with mental illness were extremely varied, they each stressed the importance of seeking professional help at the first sign of symptoms and of not being afraid to reach out to others for support. “Don’t wait until it becomes a serious problem,” one panelist, a female UCSF medical school graduate, told the audience. The woman – who, like all of the panelists, requested anonymity in this article – said she herself had avoided acknowledging or dealing with her bipolar disorder until it got so bad that she had to take time off from college. Another young woman, a second-year medical student, said her roommate at UCSF had had to confront her and accompany her to the campus health center last year before she could face up to the fact that she was suffering from depression. “Mental illness is seen as a flaw in our society,” she said, admitting that she still found it difficult to talk about her experiences. “But especially for those of us who want to go into medicine or the health professions, if we can’t come to terms with [mental illness], how can we reach out and help others?” Seeking Help Psychiatrist Rebecca Watters, MD, the panel’s moderator and director of the UCSF Medical Student Well-Being Program, said the high-achieving students at a school like UCSF are a particularly reluctant group when it comes to addressing mental illness. “People on this campus think of themselves as health care providers, not health care receivers,” Watters said. “I think they feel like they should be smart enough to work themselves out of whatever pickle they’re in, and they are also worried about their classmates finding out.” This year’s panel was the fifth of its kind, Watters said, and each year in the period following Mental Health Awareness Week, both her program and Student Health Services see a jump in the number of students seeking treatment. The panelists said that, beyond the need for medication and therapy, once they began to build a support system of friends and loved ones, their lives started to improve dramatically. “When I came to UCSF, I was afraid to open up,” said a 40-year-old bipolar woman who had graduated from the School of Nursing in June. “But I found I didn’t feel good about myself, and I felt separate from others. That’s a terrible, lonely way to live.” Ultimately, the panelists said, mental illness – when properly treated – doesn’t have to be a barrier to happiness, career success or fulfilling relationships. “There is no need to lower expectations of yourself,” said a female nursing student, who had once spent 13 days in the hospital after the police picked her up off the street during a psychotic episode. “Mental illness isn’t a barrier to doing what you want to do with your life,” the female medical school graduate added. “I’m married; I have three kids; I have a great life. Mental illness is part of that life, but it’s not everything.”